Air Force Assistance Fund - The Personal Side Published March 20, 2008 By Staff Sgt. Kelly Young 43rd Maintenance Squadron POPE AIR FORCE BASE, N.C. -- My 6-year-old daughter, Chloe, is autistic. Autistic is such a general term now. Last year my daughter didn't say things you didn't understand, and without reason and didn't do any form of communication other than screaming from anger or snuggling for being tired, she wasn't potty trained which is difficult when she is that age, but as far as physical attributes -- she has hands that Randy Moss would be jealous of and can jump on a trampoline for hours. She can run around the house endlessly. By endlessly, I mean "when will she go to sleep" is a thought I have had many times. I accepted her disabilities and pray about it every night. Also my wife is the strongest person I know. Sure, I could mop the floor with her Ultimate Fighting Championship style, but she has given up everything in her life to take care of my daughter -- she takes good care of my son too, but he isn't quite as demanding. She will fight to the bitter end to get my daughter the care that she needs. Monday through Friday during hospital and school hours, I rarely ever see her. This brings us to my story. Last year, I read an article in the paper about Air Force Aid Society written by Col. John McDonald, 43rd Airlift Wing Vice Commander. He basically said that for the price of popcorn and a drink at a movie you could really help your fellow Airmen through the Air Force Aid Society. Well, at the time I thought 'yeah, he is right.' Just a little thought was put into the article and I just went on about business. Actually, I've always thought to myself in confidence how I wouldn't ever need it or have the opportunity to use it, and really didn't know anybody who had. Not to mention, at the time I was pretty cocky about what I had accomplished and where I was going in the in the Air Force. If there was a trophy, I got it. I've made every rank the first time with a line number for technical sergeant right now. Everything was going just fine. Then came the eye opener; remember in the first paragraph my daughter is autistic. My wife spends her life taking care of her. I deploy all over and I hate to say it, but a deployment for me was a mental vacation from my everyday life. My wife never gets that, and really deserves it. But this isn't about a break for my wife, its about a break through for my daughter Chloe. Chloe received a prescription for a new kind of oxygen therapy. At the time, I had dealt with her disabilities through the school system, primary care manager at the base medical facility, numerous therapies, and basically accepting that she will have these problems, but knowing that my family had to try to do everything and anything possible to help her. We tried everything; for a long time, nothing seemed to work. Chloe then went to Hyperbaric Oxygen Therapy (HBOT) for 40 visits. The cost was $1600 and that was with a huge discount; normally it's $50 a visit and the place is a good 120-mile round trip. We make two visits a day Monday through Friday. About halfway through, she started to change. She started to make progress. She is now potty trained and is starting to use sign language to communicate. When I make her mad, instead of shrieking, she says "no". But she doesn't have a huge vocabulary -- yet. The doctors found her niche, I now know that the HBOT treatment is going to be the difference between her being on disability for the rest of her life or possibly being a tax payer. All I have to do is go get one of these chambers because I can't afford the monthly cost. Awesome -- but wait, the chamber is close to $17,000, and I didn't mention that my daughter goes to school and therapy in Cary, N.C. Monday through Friday. Doctor's appointments in both Chapel Hill at the University of North Carolina and Wilmington. The price of my cars and gasoline are more than half my check. My budget is more than tight to begin with, then I have to get a chamber. I contacted my insurance, and had a conversation with them that made me angry. I'm sure they would love to help, but I'll leave my opinion out because they don't print curse words in the paper, and yelling and screaming would not have gotten me anywhere. Not saying that I didn't do that -- but first I hung up the phone or closed the door to the room I was in to remain professional, which is hard to do when it is for your daughter. When searching for advice, everyone on the planet told me to contact Oprah, or the people on ABC that build you a house, or Dateline NBC. But guess what, Oprah isn't in cahoots with your first shirt, command chief, or wing Commander. She probably gets 20,000 requests a day, and I live in base housing and really don't want to get a free house or publicity cause of my daughter's autism. I don't want much of anything. I really don't want to be writing this article, but I need to. I need to for my children's needs to be met. I would go on Oprah for it; I'd probably do anything for it. So we did our research -- actually my wife did the research -- and found a non-profit organization to do our fund raiser through. I then talked to my first sergeant and the command chief and they sent me to Air Force Aid Society. Air Force Aid Society gave me a grant for $3,000 toward the chamber. All I had to do was supply them with the prescription, all my pay data, and talk to one of the nicest people on the base in Dawn Doan at the Airman and Family Readiness Center. They wrote the check to the company, all I had to do was mail it. You have a high-ranking gentleman write an article, you read it, you think about it for five minutes, then go on with your day. You find yourself between a rock and a hard place and you realize the reason why the person wrote the article -- they hear and see these types of situations and they know who takes action for the good of their people. Giving money themselves is the first step, but getting the word out to others is their part of their being a leader. I never thought that I would be on the receiving end of any kind of charity. My first sergeant, Senior Master Sgt. Rickey Maddux, was instrumental in getting this done. I actually told him, "I don't think the AFAS will do anything with me on this" and he responded "Looky here, you talked to me and the command chief and all; give them a try and see what happens. HUA." The Air Force Aid Society was very helpful. I have to thank the Air Force Aid Society for their contribution. The Knights of Columbus accounted for well over half of my fundraising efforts. They helped me by their own contributions, selling Fayetteville FireAntz hockey Tickets with me, and volunteered to help me before finding out that I happen to be the same religion as they are. I like what the Knights of Columbus stand for so much that I am going to become a Knight myself, just as I am going to faithfully donate to the AFAS for the rest of my career. Hopefully if you are reading this article and your in the Air Force, you can do the math. I am a staff sergeant, I make $2,400 a month (staff sergeant at six years and before taxes). $2,400 minus $1,600 for monthly chamber visits equals $800 left. Add the gas to get back and forth and that leaves me with $500 if I am lucky. That is not going to pay for your groceries, car, car insurance, phone, cable, and whatever else you need. Most people reading this will have their car and insurance over $500. March 28th at the FireAntz game, the FireAntz are going to present my daughter's chamber fund with a check. The FireAntz helped me by allowing me to sell tickets as a fund raiser, having their goalies sign a stick which they auctioned it off and more. March 28th my fundraiser for my daughter will be complete. Without the help of my first sergeant, command chief, the Air Force Aid Society, the Knights of Columbus, The Fayetteville FireAntz and The Arc of Cumberland County for taking the donations I would be still be trying to call Oprah. I have to tell you in closing that I am by no means an accomplished reporter for a newspaper. I hope that the editors don't try to hack up what I wrote here, and I hope Colonel McDonald doesn't come looking for me because I had to learn my lesson first hand. So when your squadron representative comes up with their Combined Federal Campaign, just remember that the Air Force Aid Society helps you. It helped me and if you need to put a name with it; my name is Staff Sgt. Kelly J. Young. A lot of doors got slammed in my face while trying to do what is right for my daughter. People will tell you it can't be done. Just remember one thing "success is what happens when failure isn't an option" -- I don't know who made it up. It sounds clever, so for now its mine and it keeps me going. When everyone was slamming doors in my face, the Air Force Aid Society welcomed me and contributed.